I went to my first spinning class today. That's me in the back row barely able to stand up and pedal because I forgot how to exercise and ride a bike. It's been that long.

I told you I was serious this time though. I've got to lose some weight. I've given up most everything that has been getting me through the worst of my days...dangerous amounts of chocolate, Starbucks delicacies, fast food, pasta, bread. Have I lost my mind?

I'd give up sugar altogether but who am I kidding?

When I handed the girl at the front desk at the gym my membership card she looked at me with the strangest look, like maybe she had heard about me. in one of her employee trainings...like I was some kind of a legend. Angela, the girl that has been paying monthly dues for a gym membership but hasn't been in two years. That's some kind of record. I thought bells and buzzers were going to go off and confetti and balloons were going to drop from the ceiling upon my check in.

But I went to the gym today and broke a sweat. And thank goodness I didn't run into anyone I knew. The class was really hard and even harder than that was the seat. I've gone on bike rides before and never has my butt hurt so badly; maybe because I weigh so much more now. The class was physically painful and there was no clock in the room and I don't wear a watch so I had no idea how long 45 minutes took to go by but it seemed like 6 hours. Next time, I hope to go with someone. My friend Rosie is a frequent "spinner"; maybe I can get some motivation or tips from her. They say you're more likely to work out if you have a partner or someone to push you.

Will I go back? Absolutely. I need to get in shape. I'm tired of feeling miserable and avoiding mirrors. Next time I will wear some serious padding in my pants, maybe one of the Doodle's diapers and I won't tie my shoe laces so tight that I get a foot cramp.

This weight loss thing is not easy and I'm the type of person who needs to see results right away or I get discouraged and I'll go eat a baker's dozen of donuts to show "them". So I'm hoping if I can kick start my metabolism with a few work outs and continue to be careful with what I eat I will see results and that will be enough to motivate me to keep going. It's been almost 3 weeks of some serious food discipline and I'm still not losing the weight I thought I would by now.

The new scale isn't helping either. I think it should go back.

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